Friday, 10 July 2009


I fly in my sleep
through towns & cities
down rivers & seas
no rules
no laws
no violence
no wars
free of pain
free of regret
my heart beats faster
I fall to towards the ground
I wake with a start
I'm back in that room
machines beeping
my body not working
I want to be gone
I want to be free
I want to fly forever
but life won't allow me to be.

Wednesday, 8 July 2009

Putting things in sharp focus!

I have just come out of the worst depression I have ever experienced. All built up by my job loss, looking extensively for a new one and going straight into a new job that I am not too happy with.

I felt nothing, I wanted to see no one and I just kept thinking about how 'unlucky' I was!

Then on Sunday I decided enough was enough and I have tried since then to think only positive things and smile. But as the title of this entry says I saw something on TV that put things into sharp focus, it was a programme on teenagers with cancer on channel 4.

These brave people are going through the worse possible pain and sickness but have so much dignity and spirit. The one that still sticks in my mind was a girl who had a brain tumor and was hoping to go home in 4 weeks after her treatment finished. She was so brave, so bright, then she suddenly died in her mother's arms!

I suppose my message to myself and too other with depression is yes it's a hard path we walk but it is nothing compared to what these teenagers and other go through on a daily basis.

We are healthy, we are lucky and we are alive. Every breath we take is something we should treasure, look around and see the world for all the possibilities it can offer, you never know what's around the corner!